


The Death of Rat and Other Stories

by gamb



Category: Magic: The Gathering (Card Game)
Genre: Character Death, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Horror, My friends need to be punished, Not to be taken seriously
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-23
Updated: 2020-04-23
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:29:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23813839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gamb/pseuds/gamb
Summary: In which the characters who annoyed me inWar of the Spark(which is all of the characters inWar of the Spark) receive their karmic comeuppance
Comments: 3
Kudos: 3





	1. Rat

**Author's Note:**

> On this, the one-year anniversary of the novelization of _War of the Spark_ , it's fair to say that this book and its sequel have broken me. I still sometimes sit up in the middle of the night and remember something that happened in them and can't sleep for sheer irritation of how _stupid_ it all was.
> 
> Character in chapter title dies, fyi

Rat didn’t land in mud.

She thought it was mud, at first. It squished under her wrung-out body like mud did, cold wetness soaking into her clothes, a tinge of decomposition warmth underneath. The smell was mud-like too, albeit the smell of mud dredged from the rankest, stickiest swamp there could be--one of the ones at the edges of no-man’s-land where the Izzet sewers emptied out and the Simic dumped their failed experiments and the Rakdos drowned their sinners.

But it wasn’t mud. Teyo’s dismayed shriek was the first sign something wasn’t right, followed by an exclamation by Kaya. Rat didn’t know how they could possibly be doing anything right now, so exhausted was she by the rigors of planeswalking, but she found it in herself to roll over and push herself up on hands and knees.

It wasn’t mud. Blood. Old blood, half-congealed, clotted and sticky. Rather mud-like, actually, now that she could compare the two. It covered the ground as far as she could see--where had it all come from? This wasn’t a battlefield; there were no bodies, no slaughter, no sign of what had caused it. A bizarre spell?

Teyo wiped his hands desperately on his pants, while Kaya knelt, hunched, looking around aghast. Only Ana seemed unperturbed. She stood, eyes closed, smiling as if she’d just taken a bite of something delectable.

“This isn’t--where did you take us?” Kaya demanded, gasping for air. Exhausted, as Rat was, from the dual planeswalk.

“Alara, darling. Grixis, to be specific. Marvelous, isn’t it? I’ve been to many places, and there’s really nowhere like it.” Ana raised her arms and curled her fingers, gathering mana. “An excellent place to make a fresh start, don’t you think?”

“What are you doing?” Kaya demanded. She pushed herself to her feet, swaying under the weight of exhaustion.

“Making a choice,” Ana said, and her smile grew, becoming positively beatific. “Thank you, by the way--I never could have done it all without you.”

“What’s she talking about?” Teyo asked. The boy looked confused, but fear was showing through in the twitching ripple of his brow. 

Kaya drew her daggers in lieu of answering. Rat struggled to lift herself out of the blood puddle and slipped. The ground sank under her feet and made footing treacherous.

“Saving me from that djinn, faking my death, ridding me of the Chain Veil--you’ve all been a wonderful help. So I’ll play nice, and give you a chance.” Ana brought her arms down, muscles straining as if she was tearing the air between her fists. The ground shook.

Kaya lunged unsteadily forward, daggers bared, but a wall of white crashed between her and Ana.

“Teyo!” Kaya yelled. She slipped as she was forced to stop short on the slick ground.

“It’s not her! She said she had changed, she’s possessed or something--”

“Or she’s a fucking liar! Either way, get out of the way! We don’t have time!”

The ground flexed and boiled, and from the bloody pool hands emerged, fingers rotted and skeletal. Panic and disgust gripped Rat in equal measure; she stumbled to Teyo’s side, high-stepping to avoid the grasping hands that were now growing into arms and shoulders and skulls. She fumbled for her knives.

“What do we do?” he asked.

Kaya had made her way around Teyo’s barrier, but Ana vanished with a grim chuckle and a cloud of smoke just as Kaya reached her. The zombies got to their feet, dripping blood back into the pool. Rat didn’t like to exaggerate, but she thought there might be a hundred of them, at least.

“How’d she make so many?” Rat wondered aloud. More hands were appearing farther from them as the spell roiled its way across the macabre landscape. Fighting was a losing proposition, and they could not run.

Teyo wove a shield around the two of them and, visibly straining, formed another around Kaya a few yards away. Color rose in his cheeks, under the muck. 

“What do we do?” he repeated. His arms shook.

“We have to go,” Kaya shouted. “Can you make this shield follow me? I’ll come to you.”

Teeth bared, Teyo nodded, and Kaya began to run, zig-zagging through the zombies. They grabbed at her, leaving grimy trails on the glistening shield; more of them clustered around Teyo and Rat’s bubble, hammering insistently. Teyo flinched at each hit. Feeling helpless, Rat encouraged him, keeping up a steady babble of  _c’mon’_ s and _you can do it’_ s.

A zombie stepped in front of Kaya; the shield collided with the zombie, Kaya collided with the shield, and Teyo cried out. The shield around Kaya collapsed and she fell against the zombie, who seized her arms in a vicious grip. She screamed and kicked ineffectually at the thing’s legs.

“C’mon, we have to do something!” Rat grabbed Teyo and pulled him towards Kaya, but he set his feet and would not move.

“I can’t move the shield,” he gasped. “I’m sorry, I can’t.”

“We gotta do something!” Rat insisted, panickedly looking from Kaya to Teyo. “At least let me out, they won’t see me!”

“I’ll come back!” Kaya shouted. The zombies converged around her and red blood, fresh blood joined the stagnant pool. Abruptly, her scream ended, and it was only when the zombies turned towards Teyo and Rat that Rat could let out a sigh of relief. Kaya had planeswalked. She had gotten away.

A chill crept up Rat’s spine. Kaya had gotten away and stranded her here. Until Kaya returned for her, she was trapped here, on this hellish plane. Her jaw trembled. She looked to Teyo, and watched, transfixed, as a bead of sweat rolled from his hairline down his temple, his cheek, to drip from his chin. He wouldn’t last much longer.

“Go,” she said. “Go, but don’t leave me here, okay? Go help Kaya and come right back.”

“I’m not going to…” Teyo’s protestation died in a wearied gasp. He knew the truth of their situation as well as Rat did. Nothing could be seen outside the shield except for mouldering flesh. “I’ll be back. As soon as I can.”

She nodded and swiped at a tear.

The flash of his leaving burned itself into her eyes, leaving blurry purple afterimages behind every time she blinked. The zombies surged forward as the shield collapsed, but they could not see her. Still, for a panicked minute she worried they might crush her unknowing in their confusion. Desperately she wiggled and squirmed through the press of dead bodies, holding her breath as best she could against the stench. Finally she made it to the edge; she staggered forward, falling to hands and knees, and crawled up a short incline to drier ground.

Grass didn’t grow on the hill, but something did. Hair, she realized with a muted horror. The ground had  _ pores _ as if it were skin, and thick strands of coarse black hair erupted from each in a gross parody of grass. It was fine, she tried to tell herself. She would not be here long; Kaya and Teyo would be back any minute, and they would take her away. All she had to do was sit here on this hill until they came back.

They didn’t come back.

Near as Rat could tell, the sun set and rose again, though it was hard to tell. The plane never seemed to be anything other than a dim twilight. But thirst scratched at her throat even though she’d drunk her waterskin minutes or hours ago, telling her that some time had passed. Enough that they should have been back.

Had Kaya been badly wounded? Wouldn’t Teyo at least have come back to let Rat know what was going on? To keep her company so she wasn’t alone? Or had something happened--had they encountered some new danger, had Ana followed them and attacked again? Why had Ana attacked them in the first place?

She wiped more tears from her cheeks. Maybe they’d decided it wasn’t worth the effort of coming to get her. Who cared about a rat, right? She told herself that wasn’t true, but she couldn’t make herself believe it. 

How long would it take for them to forget her entirely, to slip out of mind like an unimportant appointment?

The zombies still milled in the bloody swamp. Rat prayed that everything here wasn’t some disgusting parody of a body. Soon, she’d have to try to find water. She didn’t want to leave her hill--this was where Kaya and Teyo would look for her--but she needed to drink. And if everything here was like the swamp and the hill...she imagined rains of sweat and puddles of serous fluid and gagged.

“Come back,” she moaned pitifully.

They didn’t.


	2. Tomik

Tomik knew who was at the door before he opened it. No one knocked as sharply as Teysa Karlov, though he was used to hearing her knocks from the other side of the door, standing unobtrusively behind her while she called on one client or another. He opened the door with a smile.

“I hope you don’t mind,” Teysa said, pushing past him into the over-appointed office of the Orzhov guildmaster, shoes and cane clicking against the stone floor. A bottle of wine was clutched under her arm, a pair of goblets crossed in her hand. “I have had a  _ day. _ I think the Triumvirate is having second thoughts about our whole ‘arrangement’, and I’ve spent the last eighteen hours putting out fires.”

“I’m sorry. We did expect they might experience some, ah, ‘buyer’s remorse’ though,” Tomik said. Teysa flopped into the chair in front of his--well, Kaya’s--desk, and Tomik, feeling somewhat surreal, sat in the plush leather chair behind it.

“This is more than buyer’s remorse. I don’t know what’s gotten into Bilagru, but he’s being entirely unreasonable.” She placed the silver goblets on the desk, and handed the wine bottle and a corkscrew to Tomik. “If you would, please. Never quite got the hang of it myself.”

“That doesn’t sound like Bilagru.” Tomik inserted the corkscrew and pulled; the cork slid free easily with a wet pop.

“No. If I didn’t know better, I’d think someone was blackmailing him.”

“Hmm,” Tomik hummed as he poured. Bilagru was integral to Kaya’s--and thus, his--hold on the Orzhov. If the giant was being blackmailed into supporting an opposition opponent, urgent steps needed to be taken. “I don’t suppose you have any leads?”

Teysa took her wine and drained the goblet with a flourish. She placed the goblet back on the desk with a  _ clink _ and sat back in the chair, rearranging her legs so her malformed one could lay more comfortably. “Oh, Grandfather would hate to see me drink the Decamillenial like that, but I feel like I’ve earned it after everything.”

“Indeed.” Tomik sipped his own wine. It was dark and woody, though perhaps a bit too sweet. Teysa must have enjoyed it for its significance more than its taste--she’d never cared much for sweet things. “It’s very good.”

“As for leads--well, the problem is I’ve got too many.” Teysa gestured helplessly. “You know what our guild is like. And it might not even be someone from our guild--Niv-Mizzet’s ‘ascension’ has sent the Izzet scrambling for any advantage, the Simic are up to  _ something, _ and the Dimir are always a possibility. The only person on Ravnica I can honestly exclude is you.”

“I’m sorry,” Tomik repeated. “When Kaya returns, I can try to help, but at the moment, I find myself unfortunately busy. I could see about allocating someone to help--”

“Oh, don’t worry. This isn’t anything I can’t handle; really, I just need someone to complain to, and you’re the only safe option.” Teysa smiled at him fondly. “It’s all turned into such a mess, hasn’t it?”

“It’s getting better,” Tomik said, smiling back. A headache was settling behind his eyes, an interest payment on all the coffee he’d drunk to get through the day. “The tithes for this quarter are back to their usual levels, and a few of the public works projects Kaya wanted to start are finally on track.”

“Hmm. Still, what a mess. By the way, I’d been wanting to ask you--all of this started because Grandfather was careless with his spells, and failed to select a target beneficiary in case of his demise. Am I correct?”

“That’s correct.”

“Now, forgive me--I know how diligent you are in your work, but then I always thought Grandfather was quite thorough as well. You didn’t replicate his error, did you? You did select a beneficiary?” Teysa leaned forward, staring intently.

“Of course,” Tomik said. He rubbed his forehead to ease the growing tension there. “Should I be, uh, incapacitated, the contracts will all revert to Mistress Kaya.”

“That’s a relief.” Teysa relaxed and leaned back in her chair. “Oh--I wonder. Will the spell still function correctly, given that Kaya is not currently on Ravnica?”

“I’m...not sure,” Tomik admitted. “I tried to research how the spell would work given our, ah, unique circumstances, but given the tight timeline and the political concerns, I thought Kaya was the safest choice. I’ve been meaning to research the effects further, but...I’ve been otherwise engaged.” He gestured helplessly to his overcrowded desk. Perhaps he should take tomorrow off, he thought. There was a lot of work to do, but then there was  _ always _ a lot of work to do, and he had nothing time-sensitive to handle and an incipient migraine that said he’d been working too hard of late.

“Well then, it should be interesting to see what happens,” Teysa said.

“Well, hopefully  _ nothing _ happens.” Tomik chuckled and coughed. “I’m sorry I haven’t been more help, but I’m afraid I may have to call it a night. All of a sudden I’m realizing just how little sleep I’ve had.”

He stood up, but a wave of dizziness took him. His feet tangled underneath him, and he toppled over, striking his head on the desk on the way down.

Teysa stood with a sigh and took his half-finished wine and poured it carefully back into the wine bottle. “Oh, Tomik. You were a wonderful lawmage, but you never did learn how to be Orzhov, did you? Drinking a beverage a rival provided? Really, I’m amazed you haven’t fallen sooner.”

A heaviness settled in her chest. She smiled, savoring the sensation, and exited the room, goblets and wine bottle in hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sins: Being so bland he should be fed to colicky babies, being a mediocre man in the place of a far more competent woman
> 
> Sentence: Teysa Karlov'd

**Author's Note:**

> Sins: Narrative Theft, Sueness (2nd degree), Possession of Plot Coupons
> 
> Sentence: _Grixis_


End file.
